


Subject to Change

by lattekitten



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: @ like 3 am, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow. slow slow slow slow sloooooooow, also. mATT, but honestly really slow, confusion about a skirt, he makes an appearance, i don't know how to tag things and i wrote this while half-asleep, it's not me i swear it's them, keith wears a skirt somewhere in here, like a snail drenched in molasses slow, like so slow, or more, pidge is sassy and a nerd but what's new, shiro's an honorary member of the holt family, t h ey sHATT, they're dense and oblivious idiots, we shall see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 09:14:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7568587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lattekitten/pseuds/lattekitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Lance's bragging puts him in a sort of tough spot, he drags Keith down with him and now they have to face Lance's family together. </p>
<p>alternatively, they're not dead but their pride sure is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Subject to Change

**Author's Note:**

> A fic I started on my tumblr @ lattekitten. I wanna say it's my friends' fault but it's 110% my own fault, I take all responsibility for this trash. Talk to me about it, please, just like, scream about it or something, I need feedback.

Lance had always liked to brag back home. Actually, he was just very fond of boasting about assets he didn’t have.

Now this was one of Lance’s many flaws. One wouldn’t consider this a fatal flaw of his but when one takes into account the fact that one of the many things Lance bragged about once entering into the Garrison was that he’d be bringing back a significant other back home to introduce to his family, then yes, it was a very, very fatal flaw of his. An infamous flaw of his. It wasn’t all too life-threatening, but Lance would probably die if he had to face his family without a significant other after being so overly-confident about being able to have one. Well, even more dead than he was already going to be after disappearing from the Garrison and going off into space to form Voltron and save the entire universe, especially without any notice to his family who probably thought he was dead. So yes, Lance was already in extremely big trouble when he returned home, not even saving the universe was a good enough reason to save him from his family’s wrath.

Lance had nearly forgotten about his ‘promise’ to his family until Team Voltron announced that they’d finally be able to go back home to Earth, good ol’ Terra Firma, with the Zarkon Empire finally defeated and a plethora of planets freed within the alliance they’d formed. He hadn’t been too worried about it. Oh no, he was panicking. Definitely panicking. He had only a select few options to choose from, only the residents of the Castle Ship available. He couldn’t exactly be picky in light of his situation so he figured he’d just ask all of Team Voltron to see if any of them would be willing to pretend to be in a romantic relationship with him and pray to God that one of them would say yes. 

Yeah, that was going to be easy. 

He’d asked Allura who promptly politely shut him down explaining all of the ethics and principles of a good relationship but he’d stopped paying attention once he was rejected opting to move onto his fellow paladins. He’d gotten just about the same reaction when he’d asked Shiro and high-tailed it out of there in search of either Hunk and Pidge. He’d wandered the vast halls of the castle until he stumbled upon Hunk in the kitchen mixing up a brand new concoction. Go figure.

“Hey Hunk, buddy ol’ pal, how would you like to pretend to be my boyfriend for an undetermined amount of time to my family?” he’d spat out in hopes that Hunk wouldn’t catch onto his question and just nonchalantly agree like he usually did, but to his dismay Hunk’s response was:

“No way, dude. Your family knows me anyhow.” paired with a quirk of an eyebrow and the slight shrug of his shoulders.

“Aw man, I thought we were friends!” Lance’s tone indignant as he pouted, lower lip jutting out, at his larger friend.

“We are, we are. But I’m not gonna pretend to date you for the sake of your pride,” Hunk replied, his tone blunt but light. Sure, they were friends but Hunk wasn’t up to doing what he didn’t want to, he’d grown out of being dragged into things against his will. He would not be persuaded this time, especially not something as pointless as this.

“Fine, be that way…” And with that he’d gone off sulking in hopes of finding Pidge to try and coerce them to acting with him.

“No.” Was Pidge’s simple reply. 

“Oh, come on! Not you, too!” Lance was at the end of his rope at this point, grasping at nothing but straws. 

“Seriously, Lance? I’m beginning to pity you right now.” Lance sighed, leaving the twerp to tinker around with whatever contraption they’d been fiddling with before he’d interrupted them with his question. He scuffed the soles of his shoes against the flooring of the castle as he moved along the halls. Great, now what am I gonna do. He was in a tough spot, he’d asked everyone he thought would be at least a bit willing to participate in his plan and couldn’t will himself to bother with Coran. No, there was only one other option, boy was he going to regret this, but he had no other choice. Well, not exactly, but his pride wouldn’t allow him to back down, though it was suffering from the blow of having to ask Keith, Keith, of all people to cooperate with him so his pride wouldn’t completely shatter because of his family. Sure, they’d buried the hatchet a long while ago but they were still rivals and still a little rough around the edges. Fortunately for him, he knew exactly where his ‘rival’ would be without a doubt, the training room. Of course, he spotted Keith in the middle of a training session; despite the fact that Zarkon had been defeated and they had been victorious, the guy never seemed to stop training. It seemed rather pointless but so was Lance’s attempt at finding someone to be a fake couple with him, and yet here they were. 

“Hey yo, Mullet!”

There was no malice in his voice when he called out to the still somewhat shorter boy, unsurprisingly, there was also no malice in the other boys voice when he replied either.

“What do you want, cargo pilot? I’m kinda busy here, if you hadn’t noticed.” He’d already called an end to his training session upon Lance’s arrival.

“Oh, I noticed. Figured you needed a break. You do realize the inter-galactic war is over, right? You don’t have to train all the time.” Lance seriously didn’t understand the other’s need to train hours on end without any breaks, it was ridiculous, and that was coming from him. 

“I know,” he said, grabbing his towel that he always brought along with him when he worked out and started wiping sweat off his face. “Anyways, was there something you needed or did you just come here to bother me, like always?” 

“As a matter of fact, yes, I do.” He crinkled his nose, making a point to look offended at the accusation. “I’ve sort of got a favor to ask of you.”

“A favor, huh?” Comes Keith’s incredulous reply, his eyebrow raised, an irritating smirk on his face. “Nah. Don’t wanna.” Lance narrows his eyes at him before he opens his mouth to fire back at him. This little-. Lucky for Lance, he knew what to do to get under Keith’s skin and get him to do what he needed him to.

“Oh, I see. I get it, you’re not good enough to pretend to be my boyfriend, that’s it,” Lance challenges in an attempt to goad Keith. 

“Pfft, in your dreams. I bet it’s the easiest thing in the world.” Keith casts him an amused look which falters at the one Lance is shooting him back, “Let me guess, you’ve probably never even dated anyone before, have you?” He plowed on, taking the bait that Lance dangled before him.

Lance would’ve smirked at the fact that Keith had taken the bait had his brain not latched onto the other half of his statement. His brows furrow and his lips twitch and twist into a pout.

“And you have?!” He feels heat slowly travel up his face, he’s sure he’s sporting a pretty little blush right now, he convinces himself that it’s because he’s furious, at what exactly, he’s not sure.

“Well- no, but it can’t be that hard.” Keith’s face turns a little red as he sputters, a bit embarrassed to admit it.

“So are you saying yes?” Lance says with a mischievous glint shining in his deep blue eyes.

Keith seems hesitant for a moment before he utters, “I’m not saying no, you’d be too proud if I did. Wouldn’t want to stroke that huge ego of yours,” he almost immediately regrets it when Lance grins.

“Perfect.”

Then their fate was sealed.

__

Lance had quizzed Keith on some very basic, typical personal information that even casual friends would know. Little tidbits like what each other’s favorite color was, when their birthdays were, how old they both were, their full names, hobbies, general likes and dislikes, the whole spiel. They’d know a few things about each other that they discussed but Lance just had to make sure. They had to be convincing or their whole act would be all for naught. 

There were still a few days until they set down back onto Earth, they’d informed the rest of the team of the situation. They were met with incredulous laughter and playful bouts of advice wishing them good luck in their scheme. They all weren’t too sure about the two’s act but by now they were so accustomed to it they knew that there was no way of convincing either Keith or Lance otherwise; it was one thing they had in common, if they were determined to do something, nothing could deter them from accomplishing it.

“I seriously hope you guys know what you’re getting into,” Shiro voiced his concern, he’d known the two to be rather impulsive and brash about just about everything, never ones to think things through thoroughly, and was genuinely worried about their well-being.

“Yeah guys, I mean, are you sure about this? Are you guys actually gonna be okay?” Hunk chimed in, his face a mixture of amusement and uncertainty.

“Eh, they’ll be fine. Probably.” Pidge piped up, obviously unpertubed by the chain of events just waiting to happen.

“I hope you’re right, Pidge. These two need all the help they could possibly get. One must wonder how you two would attempt to pull something of this caliber off.” Allura’s brows furrowed and her eyelids drooped, hand coming up to partially cover a portion of her mouth in a gesture or concern and doubt.

“Ah, have more faith in them, Princess! They’ve certainly grown since the beginning of our journey,” reassured Coran, the only apparent optimist in this situation.

“Thank you, Coran. Yeesh, well it’s good to know that someone believes in us!” 

“I guess Coran does have a point but we still have right to be concerned,” amended Shiro.

“Alright, whatever. Enough about our plans, what are you guys thinking of doing once we get back home?” 

Home. It was an odd thing to think about. For the longest time, since they’d all boarded Lance’s Blue Lion, exited Earth’s atmosphere, and taken that leap of faith through the wormhole to arrive at Arris, home had meant the Castle. Home had meant wherever all of them were. They were family. Family. Another word that had its definition changed throughout their adventure. They’d gotten so used to their lives up in space, defending and saving the universe, fighting alongside each other, connection with one another, and now they had to get re-accustomed to their old lives. It was weird how everything had changed in a single moment but none of them would change it for the world. 

It was obvious what Pidge and Hunk were going to do. They’d go back home to reunite with their families, explain what had happened, and take the time to catch up on whatever they’d missed when they were about. 

They’d found Pidge’s father and brother during their battles to defeat Zarkon and his Empire. They were working as serfs under the careful watch of the Galran Empire until Team Voltron freed the planet they were on. It was quite the sight to see, the whole family seemed overjoyed at being able to be with each other again, to know they were alright. It was heart-warming, the scene that transpired before their fellow paladins caused smiles to break out onto their faces as well, touched by the long-awaited reunion. 

Now that they were returning to Earth Pidge’s family would be whole again; they were sure to be lectured by their mom once they got back but she’d just be relieved they were safe and together again.

Hunk could go back to his mom, dad, and older sister back at their family house. He was absolutely certain he was going to get an earful once he got home just like Lance would. His mom sure to yell expletives in her native tongue, some in Tagalog, others in Ilocano, and an endless repetition of “Ay Naku!” Accompanied with his mother’s yelling would be his father’s onslaught of questions, pestering him and stressing him for every detail of his condition and whereabouts. Only after his parents were done would his older sister step in, she’d act like the typical ateh, lecturing him about all the crap he made her go through because they both knew how their parents could get and then she’d be relieved that he’d come home. 

So there were no worries there.

Lance’s question was mostly directed at those who had no home to go back to, the ones without a family back on Earth; those being Shiro, Coran, and Allura. Perhaps it would be a question aimed at Keith too if not for certain circumstances. Sure, Shiro could possibly return to the Garrison but after what happened the last time he was there, Lance figured he prefered not to. Allura and Coran were probably going to go off to secure more planets into their peaceful alliance and spread their diplomacy throughout the universe.

They were all going to go their separate ways it seemed. 

__

They were only a few ticks away from touching down on Earth soil. Heh, ticks, how long ago did they stop using seconds? It seemed so far off. 

The moment the Castle Ship’s doors opened, the future seemed so uncertain for everyone. Ever since they’d all met, they only had one goal in mind and now that it had been achieved no one knew what to do. Their futures were what they made it now. 

“Promise we’ll all keep in touch?” 

Lance’s query broke the suffocating silence that drowned each member of the team. They all stared back at Lance, eyes wide. They knew him to be the most emotional of the team but they figured he would be the one joking in an attempt to lighten the mood so his question came as a surprise. Lance had his moments. The other members of Team Voltron offered him reassuring smiles their features soft. Both Shiro and Allura walked up to him and placed a soothing hand on his shoulders as if to convey to him and themselves that everything was going to be okay, that they’d all be there for each other. 

Lance refused the urge to cry opting instead for a wry comment, “Thanks, Mom and Dad.”

And with that, the moment was ruined.

Despite Lance’s lame remark, everyone broke out into small fits of laughter and giggles, a smile splayed across each one of their faces. They walk down the platform as a unit, each of them in step with one another, all pausing once their feet hit the Earth. It feels so surreal to be back. The feeling of the ground beneath their feet, the smell of the air as it brushes past them, the sights and the sounds, everything. It’s a brand-new beginning for all of them all over again. 

“So, uh, I guess… I guess this is it, huh, guys?” Hunks voice sounds breaking the silence that’s once again come over them.

“Yeah… Yeah. I guess it is.” 

“It feels... good... to be back.”

“Back…”

“Yeah. We’re back.”

Just as the silence was about to creep up on them again Lance threw his arms open wide and clapped his hands together in an exaggerated motion. The sudden noise and movement snapping everyone out of their daze.

“Well!” He began. “I don’t know about you guys, but, I’ve got a family to get back to and a plan set into motion! Now let’s get a move on!”

“Ugh, my family’s gonna kill me!”

“You guys are over-exaggerating, I’m sure they’ll be happy to have you back home safe.”

“Yeah, only after they kill us.”

They dissolved into casual conversation and small talk, discussing their plans before dispersing out, saying their farewells as they went. Hunk had left first, he was the most worried about his family and felt he needed to get back to them as soon as possible to explain everything and keep them worried no longer. Allura and Coran had gone off next, the needs of the universe couldn’t be kept waiting, and besides, there was no place for them to stay on Earth despite what the others said, though they promised to visit often whenever deemed possible. After them followed Pidge and their family, and Shiro. After all that happened with the Pidge’s brother, Matt, Mr.Holt, and Shiro between the Kerberos mission and now, they had a lot of catching up to do and wanted to celebrate their reunion as well as everything Shiro had done for them; he was practically considered family to them at that point. That left only Lance and Keith to linger behind. Lance strode forward leaving behind the empty lot the Castle Ship had left while Keith stood stock still in place. Lance turned back to look at him, arms crossed behind his head, hands clasped behind his head. Keith only stared back at him, his face blank.

“Well, what are you waiting for?!” Lance called out to him, arms flailing about, “Come on, dropout, we’ve got a plan to set into motion! Or are you chickening out last minute?” Lance flashes Keith a smirk and Keith returns the favor with one his own.

“You wish.”

And then they were off, hitting the ground running.

__

It turns out that Lance’s family had to own a rather large house to accommodate his enormous family. 

When they’d reached the front door of Lance’s house Keith had couldn’t help but to stop and stare at just how humongous the place was. He had to wonder just what exactly he had gotten himself into. He got his answer when Lance opened the front door and announced his arrival to everyone in a five-block radius. It was a good thing Lance’s family’s house was a bit isolated away from other neighboring residential housings. As soon as Lance shouted there was a pause in the bustle and shuffle of the house, then a rush of footsteps, followed shortly by Lance being bum-rushed and assaulted with questions by all of his relatives, his mom, dad, aunts, uncles, gramps, grans, and cousins, everyone. He was drowning in questions ranging from “Where have you been?!” and “How dare you not call us!” which oddly didn’t sound like questions at all. 

“OKAY, Okay! Everybody calm down!” Lance had obviously slipped up when he’d told them to calm down because they’d countered back even louder screaming about how they couldn’t because he’d been missing for who knows how long.

“ALRIGHT! Seriously, just shut up so I can explain!” 

Apparently that was good enough to quiet his family for a while, that is, until they set their eyes on Keith and a whole new onslaught of questions brewed up.

“You realize we can’t answer these questions IF YOU KEEP SHOUTING THEM ALL AT ONCE.” 

That one seemed to shut them up well enough and Lance had gotten all of them to sit down soon after too. Man, if Keith thought Lance was a handful he was in for it. 

“Ay dios mio, finally. Now just let me explain, I promise to tell you guys everything,” silence, “I know you were all probably really worried about me, but trust me, I was perfectly fine. I just had to go into outer space for a while to form this super cool, giant robot in order to defeat the forces of the Galran Empire commanded by this evil dude named Zarkon and protect the universe as a pilot and paladin.” 

There was a long pause, it seemed as if everyone was having trouble processing such unimaginable information, but after a few moments a look of understanding swept across all of their faces and they all nodded simultaneously. The expression on Keith’s face the absolute picture of bewilderment. Seriously, just like that?! He chanced a glance at Lance who was looking his way with an apologetic smile plastered on his face as he shrugged as if telling him to just go with it. Keith shut his eyes and took a deep breath, he’d gotten himself into this and he’d just have to deal with the odd habits and occurrences that came with being around Lance. 

“Hm, yeah, that sounds about right,” said a middle-aged woman, who Keith could only assume was Lance’s mom, she had voluminous, curly dark brown locks and bared a strong resemblance to Lance. Her serene, deep blue eyes turned intense as she set her sights on him. For one reason or another Keith felt a shiver travel up his spine. That can’t be good. And he was right.

“Alright, now that that’s all cleared up, onto the next order of business,” Lance’s mom grinned as she got moved in on Keith, Definitely not good, “Who might he be?”

Lance’s mom’s question caused another outbreak of questions, Keith was being bombarded with voices and noises as Lance’s family members clambered to get a better look of him and interrogate him. Keith was vaguely sure he could hear Lance’s voice in the cacophony of it all probably trying to get them to quiet down once again. Everyone’s voices a jumble of sounds, each of them spewing question on top of question on top of question, it was really starting to give him a headache.

Someone must have noticed Keith’s obvious discomfort because the noise had died down and everyone seemed to have gone back to their positions on the floor, all waiting patiently to properly begin the interrogation of “Lance’s Boyfriend.”

Keith was quick to figure out that Lance’s family absolutely did not understand the art of taking turns. As soon as someone opened their mouth everyone else began speaking, but at least this time Keith was able to catch a few phrases.

“So this is the one, huh?”

“Is he hungry?”

“What’s he do?”

“Where’s he from?”

“How’d you two meet?” 

“I don’t like that look on his face.” 

“That’s just his face.”

“Even more so!”

“He from the Garrison, too?”

“Wow, he’s cute.”

“He’s got my taste.”

“Don’t go trying to steal your nephew’s boyfriend!”

“Buzzkill.”

“His hair’s funny.”

“What’s his name?”

Keith took a few moments to process everything being thrown at him but he was at a loss for words. Some of those weren’t even questions per se how was anyone supposed to respond or react to them, Keith had no idea. So there they sat, silence lingering in the air as they all awaited a response from Keith. He opened and closed his mouth repeatedly trying to find the answers to all of their questions only to come up empty handed, he must’ve looked like a fish out of water with his mouth gaping open wordlessly. 

“Uh…” He manages to get out, all members of Lance’s family leaning in closer, Keith had never imagined stares to be so… daunting. Their questions were so jumbled he had no idea how in what order he should answer them in and decided to go straight for a simple introduction instead.

“Well, I… I’m Keith. Keith Kogane. Um… I’m 17... and I met Lance at Galaxy Garrison?” 

Pause. Every last one of Lance’s relatives stayed quiet as they appeared to be studying him and mulling over his answer. They remained that way for what Keith would consider a tense few seconds before made a move. Lance’s mom made a sound similar to a hum of approval and Keith assumed that it meant something good, his suspicions confirmed when the rest of Lance’s family followed suit though some looked less pleased than others. Keith’s eyebrows raised as Lance’s mother clapped her hands together in a showy fashion, so that’s where he gets it from, and the rest of them stood at attention in some sort of order. 

“Alright everybody, introductions, come on!” She spoke in a way that commanded attention and thus it was granted. 

Keith scanned the crowd and followed their gazes to who appeared to be the smallest of the bunch. 

She was a petite little girl with auburn brown hair that barely grazed her shoulders, big bright, electrifyingly blue eyes, and a few freckles littered her faintly rosy cheeks. She swayed slightly back and forth on the balls of her feet and gave him a small wave before introducing herself. 

“Hiya, I’m Roselie but everybody calls me Rosie, so you can too! I’m Lancey’s youngest sister and I’m three years old!” She finished off her introduction with a big smile showing off her missing two front teeth which would explain her slight lisp. He’d seen Lance flinch a little at the nickname in his peripherals, interesting. 

As soon as Roselie, er, Rosie, was done introducing herself another little girl piped up. This one appeared to have the lightest brown hair that fell straight and went up to the middle of her back, Keith was a little surprised to find out that her eyes weren’t an astounding shade of blue but rather a warm, deep brown. Despite the mellow hue of her eyes, her irises shone with vibrancy and was only intensified by her shiny, white smile. 

“Hi! The name’s Molly and I’m five! It’s nice ta meet ya, mister!” Her voice was light and bubbly, the smile not once leaving her, if anything it had grown bigger.

In the blink of an eye, another little girl appeared in front of him, hands poised on her hips as she stood confidently in front of him. She had dark brown hair cut into the style of a short bob and stuck up at all sorts of odds and ends. There were a couple scratches that marked her face but that didn’t seem to bother her Keith observed seeing the jovial glint in her icy blue eyes.

“The name’s Carmen! I’m eight years old and I think you could do way better than my half-wit brother.” 

Oh, Keith just had to smirk at that one, especially after seeing the look of indignation that spread across Lance’s face. Poor Lance and his fragile pride. Keith could practically hear Lance griping in his head about how his own sister could do him in like that and he relished in it.

Next up was a young boy with shaggy dark locks that fell in front of his eyes which were more angular than the little girls that came before him. He’d had a couple of scratches and patches on him just like Carmen. One would think him a gloomy kid if not for the impish smirk that pulled at his lips, if anything this kid meant trouble. 

“I’m Jason and Lancey’s youngest cousin. I’m eight, too, but I’m still older than Carmen.” He ended his statement with his tongue stuck out at Carmen, petty competition apparently ran in the family too.

The next child greatly resembled Jason, right down to the shaggy hair that covered most of their face though they were without a scratch on their sun-kissed skin or that shit-eating grin. They seemed to be mellower than the other children and their voice came out quietly and a tad cold when they introduced themselves. 

“Sorry about my brother, he’s an idiot. I’m Zarina and I’m nine.” Aaand there was the shit-eating grin, truly a brother-sister duo. 

From what Keith could tell, the children of the McClain family, were little buggers at best. He really should’ve expected just as much though, considering this was Lance’s family he was talking about. His eyes skimmed over the rest of the McClain clan and noticed there were quite a few members left to be introduced. This was gonna take a while, a long while. 

The next kid in their lineup was a stocky little boy. His light brown hair was spiked up and splayed out about his head and the corner of his mouth tugged up in a small smile, he faintly reminded Keith of Hunk. 

“Uh… Hi, I’m 10 and my name’s Eric.” 

After Eric came another young girl, she had russet brown hair with some strands tied up at the side of her head that she was fiddling with and light, sky blue eyes that contrasted nicely with her melanin-rich skin. 

“The name’s Melanie. I’m 13.” And that was it, short and sweet. 

The boy that followed after Melanie could pass as Lance’s younger twin brother, they had the same stupid haircut, same lanky build, and same dumb smirk, Keith just hoped they weren’t too alike.

“Sup, I’m Damian. I’m 13 and you’re cute.” Keith fought back his barely contained cringe when Damian finished his statement with finger guns, definitely Lance’s mini-me. 

Luckily for Keith, another girl butted in before Damian could say any more. She had silky, curly black hair that flowed down her back in rivulets and stopped just past her shoulder blades. Her deep blue eyes were vibrant and fierce as she lectured:

“Reality check, doofus! One, he’s taken and way out of your league, out of Lance’s league for that matter but, well, you know, and two, you have a boyfriend!” 

“I know, I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate-- Ow! Why’d you hit me?!”

“Because you’re being stupid, duh. Anyways, sorry about that, Keith, was it. I’m Jackie and I’m 13 too, hard to believe I’m the same age as that dumbass, right?” 

“Alright you two, that’s enough,” interrupted a tall, young man with short wavy tufts of brown hair and dashing cerulean eyes. “Let’s just get on with the introductions before we give him an even worse impression. I’m Felix and I’m 14.” 

“M’ Jonathan. 15.” Came a monotonous voice. Keith looked to the source of said voice, it was boy of average stature whose hair was a mess of sooty dark tresses; his gunmetal blue eyes were as cold as his tone of speaking.

Just as Keith had finished giving Jonathan a once-over, a tawny brown arm slung itself over his shoulders. Said arm belong to a tall girl whose tan hair was pulled back into a short ponytail, fringe sharply framing the sides of her round face.

“Don’t mind glum bum over there, he’s like that around new people. So tell me hot shot, how’d a guy like you end up with my dorky little brother cuz I’m sure he’s a total catch and all.” Her voice teaming with sarcasm, laced with mockery at the seams. 

“Wow, way to talk a guy up, Anita,” Lance countered back.

“Watch your tone there, lil bro. Don’t you know better to respect your elders? What a shame, kids these days I swear.”

“Ugh, what is with you teenagers, geez,” interrupted a skinny, tall girl with striking blue eyes and short chestnut hair cut into a sleek bob. An exasperated look etched upon her features as she let out an over-dramatic sigh. This family and their theatrics, yeesh.

“Oh, shut up, Yvette. You’ve only just turned 20.” 

“And you’re 19, I outrank you.”

Just as it seemed as if a cat-fight would ensue, two identical woman sauntered up to the two girls and placed a cautionary hand upon one of each of the girl's’ shoulders.

“Girls, girls, honestly. You’re the two eldest, you should know better than to behave like this!” 

“Seriously, one would hope you’d be more mature. Pity.”

“Hey!” Came the two girls’ indignant cry.

The twins let out a synchronized sigh. “You’d think they’d have grown up by now, oh well.”

“Well, moving past all that, I’m Esti,” she said gesturing to herself and then gestured to her sister, “and that’s my twin sister Emma, in case you could tell.” 

“And I’m Lance’s Uncle Juan. I’ve got my eyes on you pretty boy, so don’t think about tryin’ nothing,” interjected a man that reminded Keith very much of Coran, but he assumed it was probably just his mustache that made him think so. 

“Um… dutifully noted… sir?” Was all Keith could do to reduce the withering glare to a less intimidating leer. 

“Knock that off, Juan, you’re gonna scare the poor boy away!” A short, slightly portly woman appeared beside Uncle Juan and pulled him away by his ear, “Pardon my husband, I’m Irene by the way!”

Keith just stared after them in confusion. This whole experience was turning out to be very… interesting. He looked over to Lance for the first time since this whole debacle began only to find him looking around the room in search something or another. 

“Hey, mom, where’s Uncle Rick and Uncle Alex at?” Lance called out only to have voice that was definitely not his mother’s respond back.

“They’re at work, sweetie! You know how their jobs are.” The voice belonged to a plump little lady with luscious curly locks that spiraled all about. 

“Right, right. Makes sense, thanks, Aunt Dani.” 

Noticing Keith’s still noticeably befuddled expression Lance explained that Uncle Rick works as a firefighter and Uncle Alex was a high-up in some big name company. Leave it to Lance to forget simple information about his own family, go figure.

“Ah, what about Abuelita?”

“Market.” Lance just nodded at that.

Lance’s mom came over to the two boys after Lance concluded his lame excuse of an explanation.

“Now that that’s all over and done with, I think you boys should go on over to your room, Lance and put down whatever belongings you may have with you. Sound good?”

“Sounds good to me, c’mon Keith.” Lance hoisted himself up and offered a hand to Keith which he gladly took, his legs almost giving out on him from sitting for so long.

“Haha, careful, dude. I don’t wanna have to carry both you and your stuff.” Lance quipped as he attempted to help steady Keith on his feet.

“Shut up and just lead the way.” Keith huffed, picking up what little stuff he had.

“Whatever.”

Lance led the way through the many halls of his house until stopping in front of his bedroom door. 

“This is it, Le habitación de Lance, make yourself at home. Mi casa es su casa,” Lance announced gesturing in a grand display to his less than grand bedroom.

“Your family sure made sure of that. Definitely felt welcomed there.” 

Keith set down his things and took a moment to observe his surroundings for once since he’d arrived at Lance’s home. Lance’s bedroom was just like any ordinary bedroom. A twin-sized bed, made, definitely not by Lance, laid in the center of the room towards the back wall. A bedside table positioned off to the left of it, a lamp sitting atop it. He had a few shelves here and there with a few trinkets strewn about them. A dresser stood off to the side right next to Lance’s closet and full-length mirror. He would have one of those. Lance really only had the basic essentials to make up his room, funny, Keith had figured Lance’s room would be more interesting than this, more personalized. The only thing that made it seem Lance-like was the color of his walls. Blue, his favorite color. Keith had at least expected heaps of clothes or knick knacks lying about all over the floor. Not that he thought about what Lance’s room was like but it had crossed his mind a few times since the whole plan was put into action. Yeah, that was it. It was the only thing that made sense.

“Yeah, sorry about that. Guess I should’ve warned you better. They can be really, uh, intense.”

“Ha, that’s one way to put it. It’s a good thing they’re entertaining though or else I’d have to gut you for dragging me into this.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Lance let out a nervous laugh, he didn’t doubt that Keith would, “just go put your shit away.”

“Done.” 

Keith looked down to what little he had and Lance followed his gaze.

“Dude, is that all you have?” Lance stared down at Keith’s belongings, he really only had his necessities, they’d stopped by his lonely shack before coming over, how could he not notice how little Keith had taken with him. Lance wondered if this was all Keith had, if it was, it made him kind of sad to think about. Did he not have anything of sentimental value? Nothing of personal value? 

“Uh, yeah.”

Before Lance could even react, his aunt Danielle came strolling down the hallway. She took one peek into Lance’s room and halted in her footsteps. She looked to Lance first, then to Keith, then Keith’s things and repeated this action a few more times before Lance spoke up.

“Aunt Dani, everything alright?” He tilted his head to the side a bit and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. His family was weird most of the time but could be downright peculiar at other times, this being one of them; it never meant anything good.

“Is that all you have, hon?” 

Keith just nodded at the repetition of Lance’s earlier question and almost immediately regretted it once he saw Lance waving his arms about and shaking his head in disapproval. He might have just signed his own death warrant by the look on Lance’s face and to both of their dismay, once Aunt Dani opened her mouth again, he might as well have.

She clicked her tongue and shook her head at them. She turned around and shouted down the hall, “Uh-uh, that just won’t do. Emma! Esti! Grab your bags, we’re going shopping!” 

The boys could hear scrambling and shuffling from down the hall and visibly paled.

That didn’t bode well with them. 

In mere minutes, Aunt Dani was joined by both Aunt Emma and Aunt Esti with Lance’s cousin Yvette and older sister Anita at their side, bags slung over their shoulders, standing just outside the doorway of Lance’s room. 

“Well what’re you boys waiting for? Get your socks and shoes on and let’s go!”

Keith looked to Lance as Lance did the same, both boys had no choice but to accept their fate, despair etched on their faces.

They were going shopping.

__

Now Lance didn’t particularly despise shopping. Oh, no, not at all. As a matter of fact, he quite enjoyed the activity but shopping with his aunts was a whole nother story. Whenever they went shopping it was an entirely different kind of experience, not that they did anything irresponsible, no, it was just that Aunt Emma could take forever in one store alone trying to scope out deals and things for cheap of good quality only to come out empty-handed, and Aunt Esti was an extremely impulsive speed shopper, she’d go into a store for 3 minutes and come out with 5 bags, and Aunt Dani took her precious time in the dressing room and always chatted up cashiers much to the dismay of the other shoppers waiting in line and the cashier. 

It was a good thing that Yvette and Anita were there to look out for them. They were conscious shoppers and responsible with their money. They’d be able to keep his aunts in check if anything went awry, at least Lance hoped so. 

When they’d arrived at the mall it was relatively peaceful, a few people milling about and strolling along on their merry ways, some with bags in hand others not. Lance’s aunts scouted the mall for stores to shop at, either for themselves or for Keith, he couldn’t tell. As they observed the mall and its stores, Lance looked over Keith, what kinds of clothes would a guy like Keith even wear? From what Lance could tell, their styles weren’t all too different though he supposed Keith went for more of an edgier style than Lance did, opting for the “laid-back cool guy” look rather than being a total and complete tool. Lance could admit to himself that Keith was a pretty stylish tool, but still a tool at best. Keith noticed Lance looking at him and raised an eyebrow at the other boy before they were both dragged into a clothing store of Lance’s aunts choosing, they were blinded by the transition from the mall’s mellow lighting to the store’s bright lights. As soon as they crossed the threshold of the store Lance’s aunts went to work, sifting through aisles and piles, rummaging through all sorts of different kinds of clothing and picking out whatever they deemed appropriate. Yvette, Anita, Lance, and Keith all stood idly by watching as the adults scurried about the store knowing better not to intervene in their antics. Lance felt a pair of eyes staring in his direction and looked to Keith, but after finding him still looking over to his aunts running around he thought nothing else of it.

Once Lance’s aunts decided that they each had a sizeable amount of piles of clothing in hand they set off to the dressing rooms, the teens following just behind them. Lance noticed Keith lagging a bit further behind their small group and fell into step beside him, aware of Yvette’s watchful eye on him as he slowed down to be next to Keith. 

“Yo, slowpoke, what’s up?”

“That’s a lot of clothes.”

“What? Intimidated, Keith?” Lance teased, waggling his eyebrows.

“No. Just, who the hell needs that many clothes?!” Keith countered back incredulously, looking at Lance as if he’d grown another head.

“Oh, you don’t even know the half of it. This is just the first store we’ve hit up.” Lance had a smug grin on his face, it feel good to know something Keith didn’t even if he did have an unfair advantage, he’d take what he could get. Small victories.

“First store?! You mean there’s more?!” Keith definitely looked like he was beginning to regret ever signing himself up for this but he was never one to back out of a challenge, he sure as hell wouldn’t be starting now, and this could definitely be considered a challenge. Quite the formidable one at that.

Lance let out a small chuckle before chiding, “Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, my family doesn’t come to the mall to only go to one store.”

Keith groaned as he was pushed into the fitting rooms but not before complaining, “Don’t dressing rooms have limits or something? I’m sure this,” he gestured to the enormous heap awaiting him in a stall,” goes way above that limit.”

“Don’t worry about it, man. My family knows people, it’s totally fine, now go on and change already! You’re holding us up, we’ve got more stores to hit up!” Lance reminded as he shoved Keith into the stall and promptly shut the door on him. 

“Shouldn’t you be a bit nicer to your boyfriend? I mean, seriously, it’s a miracle you even have one, let alone someone as cute as him,” chastised Aunt Esti. 

Lance tried his best not to gag at the use of the term boyfriend, wouldn’t want to blow his cover. “Nah, it’s cool, we’ve always been like this. It’s out of adoration… and habit.” He attempted to act nonchalant as to not give anything away which seemed to work since she just shrugged in response.

“Whatever you say, niño, he’s your boyfriend but don’t blame us if dumps you anytime soon.”

“No worries, he won’t.”

“Well as long as you’re sure. But if he does wind up dumping your sorry ass just know that I’m totally gonna try and snatch’em up.” Aunt Dani joked. 

“...You’re joking, right?”

“Duh, kiddo.”

“You know, I can never tell with you people.” 

He’d received a noogie for that one.

__

A few moments had passed since Keith had entered the fitting room stall and he still had yet to come out. He’d been sifting and sorting through the mountain of clothes that was bestowed upon him into neat, organized piles. He’d had them arranged based on the types of clothing, a pile for bottoms, a pile for tops, and another one for sweaters and jackets. There was only one thing that seemed out of place among all of the different garments. Keith held in his hands a single frilly, pink skirt as he examined it trying to discern what it was doing with all the other clothes in that huge mess Lance’s relatives had picked out for him. On one hand, know how weird this family was, it could’ve been completely intentional that this item was with the other pieces of clothing, but on the other hand, it might’ve been a mistake, it could’ve just wound up thrown into the bunch on accident. Do they… do they really want me to try this on?

Keith must have been holding his staring contest with the skirt for quite some time until Lance called out.

“What’s the holdup, mullethead? How long does it take to try on a couple of clothes?”

Keith wanted to argue that, no, it wasn’t “a couple of clothes” as Lance had put it, it was a fucking mountain of clothing, but he held his tongue still contemplating the skirt within his hands. He probably spaced out for a while too long because Lance called out again.

“Seriously, dude, did you like, die in there or something?”

Keith honestly had no idea what to do with the piece of clothing in his hand, so he did the only thing he could think of doing in a situation like this. He steeled himself and apprehensively opened the stall door. He was greeted with the curious gazes of some of the McClain family when he poked his head out from behind the door.

“Uh…” He started, not quite sure how to phrase his question.

“Something wrong, hijo?” 

“Ah, no, well… Um, did you actually want me to try this on or was it just a joke?” He asked, holding out the item in question in front of him. Keith was more than a little flustered and his face was flush, rightfully so under such embarrassing circumstances.

No one reacted for a second, all too busy trying to register what Keith had just asked, but when it did, smiles split across their faces some wider than others.

“Oh yeah, definitely!” and “Oh no, it was an accident!” sounded at the same time, half of them insisting he try on the skirt, the other half apologizing and telling him not to. He didn’t have any more of an idea on what to do than he did before so he just backed back into the dressing room, locking the door behind him. He stood there staring at the offending item that he held for a while until making his decision.

Outside of the clothing stall, Lance paced around impatiently, this was the part of shopping with his aunts that he despised the most. Trying on clothes was such a waste of time, he didn’t see the point in it, if the clothes were in your size and you liked how you looked then just buy it, simple. Anita watched him squirm for a bit before attempting to end his suffering.

“Hey, Keith, are you done in there yet? We’re all waiting to see what you look like in the clothes we picked out!” 

They only had to wait a few seconds for Keith to hesitantly open the door, he looked a bit reluctant and frustrated by the way his brows furrowed upward and his lips pulled into a thin line. He took a moment before he took a step out into the open. 

“Oh my--!!”

“...Wow.”

Keith was wearing a nice, form-fitting black shirt with red trim, which didn’t seem too out of the ordinary, actually, it seemed to suit his style pretty well, but that wasn’t what Lance’s family gasped and gaped at. It was the fact that he was wearing the skirt he’d been holding earlier that surprised them. It took everyone a while to get their bearings straight before they could properly react. Yvette had her hands cupping her face with a large grin plastered on her face. Anita had a hand in her hair staring unbelievingly at Keith, a hand poised on her propped up hip. Aunt Esti was trying to contain herself, hands clasped over her mouth barely concealing her goofy smile. Aunt Emma had an arm crossed over her chest propping up her other arm that was raised to her face, hand cupping her chin as if in contemplation of something. Aunt Dani was having trouble containing herself, she had one hand over her mouth and one hand over her stomach, her shoulders were shaking slightly obviously trying her best not to laugh. And then there was Lance, he stood stock still, mouth ajar, a light blush dusted his cheeks as he stared wide-eyed at Keith. Then in a split second, everyone lost it. Yvette and Aunt Esti broke out into a fit of giggles, clasping their hands together with one another, smiling like ninnies as they bounced on their toes. Anita had a wry look on her face, eyebrows furrowed and lips quirked up into a smirk, hand still strewn in her hair. Aunt Emma retained her posture but was now smiling like mad. Both Aunt Dani and Lance let loose their withheld laughter. She howled and clutched the sides of her stomach, having dropped the hand that futilely covered her mouth. Lance was in a similar position, he was practically keeling over laughing, his face growing redder by the minute from the lack of oxygen. Keith was sure his own face was turning red but for a different set of reasons, primarily utter humiliation and embarrassment. 

He must have looked pretty pitiful because the moment Lance looked over to him he made an effort to calm himself, now he was just huffing and wheezing, a huge smile still tugging at his lips as he made his way over to Keith.

“Ha...ha...K-Keith, c’mon, i-it’s….s’not that bad,” Lance managed between huffs, trying to slow down his breathing and placing a wary hand on Keith’s shoulder.

After Keith didn’t respond Yvette chimed in, much to his chagrin.

“Hehe, yeah, Keith, it looks really good on you!”

Keith let out an indignant huff and retreated back into the room closing the door a bit harsher than necessary. His face was hot, flushed a bright shade of red that would probably put his signature red jacket to shame, the muscles in his twitched as his lips trembled slightly, brows scrunched up so harshly they almost met. He clenched his fists at his sides and wrenched the damned skirt off of his body. Fucking stupid, of course it was a joke! He continued his self-deprecation until voices outside of the changing room broke him out of his thoughts.

“Do something, pendejo.”

“Rude!”

“Not as rude as you, idiota.”

A sigh and a shuffle of feet scuffling across the floor came before a few light taps on the hardwood of the fitting room door.

“Seriously Keith, it looks good. It actually suits you really well, don’t be mad.” Don’t kill me.

Keith was surprised to hear no humor in his voice but noted the tinge of fear which greatly amused him. He smirked to himself, his face still sported a pink hue and his eyebrows were still creased as he slipped on an entirely different outfit and walking out in order to reveal the ensemble to Lance and his family. This began their mini fashion show, Keith repeatedly putting on different articles of clothing and presenting the outfits to Lance’s family, Lance’s aunts, Yvette, and Anita giving hoots and hollers as well as tossing in their two cents about how he looked, and Lance commenting on a couple outfits here and there after his family hounded him to do it. About an hour of Keith changing in and out of clothes he’d finally finished trying on all of the clothes that were picked out for him and now had a sizeable pile deemed satisfactory. He excited the changing room and was about to make his way to the cash register when a pair of hands snatched up the stack in his hands and halted him in his steps. He intended to question the owner of said pair of hands but quickly identified them as Lance’s Aunt Dani.

“We’ve got this, you kids go and find a store you’d like to shop at.”

“But-”

“No ‘buts,’ mister. Think of it as a gift, or an apology, since you put up with that numbskull.”

“Hey!”

“Now go on and get!”

With that said, the four teens went off in search of another store.


End file.
